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The Problems With Half-Working

My mind has been scrambled the last couple days. I don't know why, it came on very suddenly. I've made massive strides over the two weeks before - I accomplished about six months worth of work over two weeks. I felt on top of the world. I wasn't even very tired afterwards, I felt good, ready to go.

Then yesterday, just bzzt - nothing. Foggy, almost like confusion. Couldn't focus at all. Strange. I said, y'know what? I haven't had a day off in a while, I'm just going to take the day off. Went and sat at a cafe and listened to some audio for about four hours, walked around and saw the city, went and had a massage, and then sat and ate fruit. Spend like 10 hours in a row just thinking and relaxing, which is good, I don't take full days off very often. I had some good ideas when I was out at the cafe and took some extensive notes, so I got some production out of it too without even trying to.

Now, I wish I could say, "And then I was recharged, and today I was awesome!" But no, I woke up in a fog again. Damn this. I track my time and have some routines to keep me running well, but I was foggy despite it, unable to focus really. Suck, what is this?

I was working, but it was half-working. Now, half-working is a big problem in my opinion. Half-working tires you out as much or more than real full working, but you get about 5% as much stuff done. Yes, 5%. Good work requires something like focus. It doesn't necessarily require the highest levels of focus and flow (though that stuff is very good), but it requires working through the mentally difficult parts when they come up. The worst part about half-work is you cruise through the easy enough stuff, then stumble on a difficult part.

This is doubly bad, because when you come back to your work, you're staring the hardest part in the face. This sucks, you need to kind of regroup and double down to get re-started while staring a difficult or complex part of work in the face. But again, I was in that mental fog and so I start half-working on it, and then I wander off again. And I try to come back to the work, but then - bam, there's this hard problem staring me right in the face, that I already failed to conquer twice.

My Goals for 2013

On No Status Quo

This month I started writing down my goals for the very first time. There have always been things I really want to do, but somehow I never bothered to write them down. At first I thought I was just being pragmatic. After all, I already know what my goals are. How is it going to help if I write them down?

But now I've realized that I was actually scared of the future. Writing down your goals forces you to look into your own future, and that can get scary. Not only do you have to know what you really want, but you also have to confront the idea that it's not going to happen unless you start working towards your goals.

I've always wanted to start my own business. Ever since I remember myself, I've been daydreaming about being a successful entrepreneur, being my own boss, and more recently, making a positive contribution to the world. But the ugly truth is that none of this is going to happen unless I start taking action right now. Writing down my goals forces me to confront the harsh reality and actually start working towards my future.

I know that things will get tough at some point. They always do. But persisting through hardship is what separates successful people from those who never manage to get anything done. I've learned this myself the hard way. But now that I write down my goals, I know exactly what I'm struggling for. And I won't stop until I get there.

I write down my yearly, monthly, weekly and daily goals. Most of my monthly goals are small steps towards my yearly goals, my weekly goals are small steps towards my monthly goals, and so on. If what I'm doing this month won't help me get where I want to be at the end of this year, should I really be doing it?

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